For Those Friends Who Have Been Praying For Me...(You know who you are :)! )

Here are the journal entries I told you about. The first one is from today's prayer time. The one following is an entry from March that God reminded me of today. I'm also attaching one more...something that goes along with the other two. I usually have a trusted prophetic friend read my journal entries. I have not had her read todays. So, if you feel a check in your heart that I've missed any part (for we all prophesy in part), let me know. That's why I have her check many of them. Otherwise, wow. God messed me up today with his great love and trust in me. Enjoy!

August 5, 2011

You are so much deeper than I know. Your depths are unsearchable, your rivers too wide to search out. But I am happy here on these waters. For though I may not see the depths or the eternal horizon, I am moved with every well designed ripple. Every stirring of the waters stirs my soul. Like gentle waves lapping on the shore, your presence washes over me leaving me marked and changed forever. I know that these waters are m home.

(I see myself on a canoe, a beautiful river and woods all around. Nature. Beautiful nature. An oar is in my hand and I am smiling as I push gently on).

Religion will try to tell you, child, that these waters need to be feared. But there are no dangerous rapids ahead. There are none. As far as the eye can see. There is only peace on these waters. And see? You are not alone. (I catch a glimpse of Jesus in the boat with me) There is a partnership here child. Religion wants you to fight against these oars, to strain to go further. But I promise you, as you lean into me, in harmony and rhythm with my wind, there is no effort, only rest. There may be a slight pull but that never need to pull you off course. My river is wide. It is deep but there is no getting lost in it. Rest in me. Here on these waters I have created a dance. See the oar go in, streams of water, little drops flowing off. You slice through it with no effort, not grunt or groan. It is a dance. The tools I have given in your hands, gently pushing you through the river of my presence, on a journey in which I desire to take you. Why do you fear? You are saying that you do not want to take a wrong turn. Study it, child (the river).It all belongs to me. You are either in me or you are not; either on my river or you’re not. There is no fear in love. I will direct you but you never need to raise your sails to the winds of confusion or fear. They do not blow over my river. Only the wind of my Spirit.

So, why do I feel their winds blowing on my mind? (I see my toe touch the water and it makes a ripple. I can get out on this water and walk, pulling the boat behind me.)

I do give you choices child. I let you choose to walk by faith or to walk by sight. Both are here on these waters.

Faith and sight? I thought walking by sight was bad. But you are saying that in your presence there is both?

Those who are trusted with my presence, really true friends of my Spirit, can be trusted with the right decisions. You cannot make a wrong choice if you are in me.

I don’t know if that’s true. I can do something you don’t want me to do.

Child, you have so much more freedom than you know. Do you not think that if you step out of the boat that I cannot call you down the stream to where I want you to dock?

 I am so afraid of missing you, Lord!

Child, you must not let religion and fear dictate how I interact with you. You see yourself in over your head, drowning (if I make the wrong choice), like I would punish you for choosing wrongly. I am not in this, child. I never lead you to destruction. Yes, sometimes it is just a choice. You follow the winds of your heart because I am blowing there. There are many places I could take you. It is true. If you stay in my water, there are many people who are of the same faith and family along the rivers edge, around the bend. (I can see this picture as I paddle down the stream. Camps of people by the waters edge, waving at me, greeting me. All people who are in love with Jesus along the river). All of who are your family. What is it to me child if you are with a brother or sister here or there? All are called to the same river. All are called to the same home. All are mine. If you desire certain things, step out and look at it. I do not dictate like an angry dictator captain. I have given you oars, right?

I did see that, Lord. It just doesn’t seem right.

This mistrust in you is not from me. The confusion has arisen from old voices: voices of fear and condemnation. I am on the waters. Follow me…it is all me. I am in the wind, I am in the ripple and it will not make you trip. Yes, you stepping out and making that ripple with your toe is not going to cause a tidal wave in my plan for your life. Do you not think that I have navigated you through all your wrong choices, even your wrong motivations at times, the good, the bad and the ugly? Do you not think that I see the end from the beginning, child? I am not thrown into confusion by your mistakes. When will you see that I am so much bigger than your heart believes? My love is so much deeper, child. I am both your anchor and the stream. I am the boat, the canoe, the paddle, the sound in the trees as the wind whistles through. I am the eagle flying over head. I am your all in all. I give you trust as I’ve told you before to make the decisions along the road. If you are in serious error you can trust me to send people to direct you and correct you. I have put voices in your path. Just because your husband doesn’t hear and see like you does not mean that his advice isn’t godly counsel. It is true counsel. There is a time for man to seek me clearly for direction. Other times, I have put in his heart the way in which he should go. Sometimes, I give options to the dream of the heart. Paul wanted to go somewhere but I had other plans for him.  Other times, he saw an opportunity and he (simply) took it.

I can see that, Lord. I feel like Pocahontas on the river bend. I haven’t watched that movie in years! Should I watch that now?

Why not? Go ahead. Am I in that choice? Maybe or maybe not! But see for yourself what you can see.

Ok. J

http://youtu.be/4DE5a80I8EU (Link to it on Youtube)

So I watched it. Wow. Let’s watch it again. Oh, Spirit! You are there!

See! I told you. I can speak upon your choices. You are a good daughter. You need to see that child. I give you freedom. (I see and understand that the Father puts trust in his obedient children. My earthly father didn’t have to always know exactly where and what I was doing because of the freedom trust brings)

Oh, Holy Master! Oh, I see how much fear is in my heart. I see I still need you to show me your Fathering heart towards me. I thought I was beyond this. I thought I knew.

In moments of weakness, child, I am still the same. I do not despise you when you forget or get weary. You have been on this journey a while. I see your heart, I see your growth, I see your weaknesses, too, and they are all lovely to me, child. I do not get angry in your weakness. More than anything, I want you to trust me on this river. I want you to take the oar in hand and be free.

Wow, Lord. I’m just beginning to grasp this new life in you…this freedom we have. In watching Pocahontas again…I see some things that speak so clearly:

“The river is always changing. You can’t step into the same river twice.” Your presence, while always the same, is a river. It IS always changing, ever bringing life…and anything living is always growing and moving. One drop of water in the river will never be in the same place again. It keeps on flowing. There is always movement…always a dance. Your presence is like this…as is the journey I am on in you, Lord.

“Where the gulls fly free” I don’t think I’ve seen this as clear until now. Birds really have SO much more freedom if they just fly! The caged bird, the sitting bird, the scared bird cannot soar. There is a trust in the jumping. Hmmmm…it seems you have told me this once before…

Yes. Faith is the jump!

I remember. Let me look it up. Found it! March 14^th of this year you said, “Measure your faith, not with how high you can fly…but how willing you are to jump out and try…before the wings have ever tasted wind, before the sail has ever been raised to the winds…faith is the jump!...I see that, Lord! Faith is the jump…what is the flight?...My Spirit, alone.”

Wow. How I remember.

“The sound of distant drumming” Lord, I sense this in my heart. Truly, I am in this transition. I hear it call to me.

“Should I choose the smoothest course, steady as the beating drum…or do you still wait for me, Dream Giver just around the river bend?” Wow. Faith is the jump. Your Spirit is the flight.

Jounral Entry #2 March 14, 2011

I see gates in the kingdom opening wide for me. I hear you call, my Beloved.

 

Enter in boldly, my love. This is your chamber; I have created it for you to enter and to dwell. Here past the gates of praise, I have paved the way for you with my own blood. I have entered into a blood covenant with you. A covenant that cannot be broken. Neither height nor depth, nor fear nor pain, nor principalities- who are defeated foes- can take away the binding power of this covenant. It is tied to my holy name. And it is yours. My name is yours. You have taken my name. I have given it to you. I have wed you, my sister, my spouse. You are mine forever. I have given you full access into my chambers and my court. You do not need to fear to enter for what I have, I freely give you. You are not some small thing that approaches. You are great in the eyes of heaven. Here comes my Beloved! And all of heaven stands at attention. Learn your position in me, child. Come as boldly as you dare! As boldly as you dream. I am here now for you. What would you like to say to me? Ask of me? I would give you even the nations as your inheritance. I am your inheritance. You have all of me. Ask what you will and you will receive it.

 

I see my great grandmother before my eyes. God, my heart is asking for the inheritance that she had…and even greater. For close, God breathed, God ordained encounters. To see you as you are! My Beloved! To see you in the beauty of your holiness. To be left for dead…in comparison to all other earthly things. To be so ruined by what my eye sees…to be so compelled by what is at the throne room. To be moved by you in all things, O God is my hearts desire. To know you as my great grandmother did only mightier…with the next level, God.  I believe I have claim because it is my family’s inheritance that you gave to her. I stake my claim in it. I say look on me, my Beloved, o Judge of the earth, and bestow upon me what is mine and what is yours. Oh, Holy Spirit! Take what is Jesus’ and make it mine! Do you as you promised! Come my beloved!

(I see Jesus before me, beyond the gates, arms outstretched, beckoning me with that glorious smile on his face. I stretch out my arms and reach for him…I’m not grasping him…I believe he’s beckoning me deeper inside the gates.)

Come. You were never meant to stay outside the gates or just inside of the gates of praise. My kingdom goes on and on and on. Why stay at the outer edge? 

 

There is such joy on this statement! Now I see me running in open fields.

People have no idea the vast territory that opens up to them if they will just go a little deeper. You feel stuck, child. But hear me now. You are not where you use to be. You are not where you were yesterday and you will not be here tomorrow. My Spirit woos the deepest parts of your heart and you are following.

Selah.

 

My mind has gone to the issue at hand. God you know my hearts desires. You said you would give me the desires of my heart.

I have not made you like others, child. This is not arrogance. I have put in you a last day deposit that comes forth in a holy dissatisfaction with the norm as you know it. You are meant to feast at the riches of tables, not on yesterday’s fares. You are called to higher portions, a higher relationship than that of your forefathers. It is the way of the kingdom, for one mans ceiling is to be another mans floor. You are called to start climbing the one generation’s ceilings. I am raising people up in this hour who will walk in divine healing, power, restoration. Dreams and visions are just the crux of what I am about to bring. I have found a people in the earth who are crying our day and night for my heart. The cries of the saints have reached my ears and I am listening. I will not hold my peace, child. I am raising up people who speak the truth in new ways. They will take ancient truths and reveal them in new ways. Things that my people have not seen will be excavated form the earth and taken out.

 

I see the archaeologist dig. People standing at an archeological sight, and treasure being birthed out of the earth that has been hidden for eons. It is being shown and people are sanding in amazement. It really isn’t new…but it has been lost for a long time. Lord, I see it.

 

I told you that you and others have an excavator’s sprit. This word has popped up a lot in my language with you because the hour is come. The time is now for my people to ask for ancient truths to be revealed…not just to them…but through them and to those around them. I will wake up people in the night who do not even know me and reveal to them secrets that the church has passed by. I will begin to shake the very structure of the church, child. So many have been content to stay in the box and the mold and have gotten boxed in and moldy. I will take the kingdom and give it to those who are not even apart yet. It is a sad day but an exciting one. I will not mourn long. I will celebrate the new day. I am calling you to be a part of what I am doing on the earth. It will not look like what you have known. I put the desire in you to know something new. I put the desire in you to seek out new revelation and truth. Yes, it’s true that you have not even know what to look for and seek. But I am directing every tear. I told you that your tears are like dances in the heavens. Your tears and cries to know me come across the gates of praise and into my chambers like a beautiful, graceful motion, child. I am moved and pleased. It speaks volumes in the heavens. There is nothing more pure than a heart crying out simply to know me more. This is a cry I will always honor child. And you have carried it for years. Even in the midst of your mistakes you have cried to know me more. I have shaped you and am about to spring you forth into new territory.

I see my wings. Me coming out of your arms and into the sky. It’s like you are a falconer. All I see is your special gloves and I am resting on your arms like a flacon about to fly.

 I am bringing you out to fly. I am releasing you. See it?

 

Yes, Lord!

 

Falcons all over the earth.

 

It’s like I see the same image all over the planet. The falconer releasing his bird. Wow.

 

You are not alone. This is my last day army rising up. I am teaching men and women, young and old rich and poor to fly to new heights. They have been in training. Every tear has reached my heavens and it is here where I have released my winds and taught you how to fly. You will go higher than many before you because the hour is at hand when greater signs and wonders will be released in the earth.  The hour is come and the time is now. Ask for wings to fly and it will be granted.

Give me wings to fly, God. I don’t care about how high my peers go or being the best. I want to fly as high as you command me to fly. If you say my wings will go to heights into the heavens, then that’s where I will go. If you say my wings will dive down into the waters then that’s where I will go. I keep my eyes on you, Lord. And I believe I will fly. One eagle after another. That’s what I see. I feel your pleasure, Lord.

 

Yes, child. Keep your eyes on me. This is the heart beat of keeping your eyes on me. Never looking to the left or right at what your brother or sister is accomplishing and comparing your flight. But seeing me through it all and doing as I command you. Following the path that I cut for you through the wind.

Yes, Lord. So awesome. So, SOOO awesome!

 

Measure your faith, not with how high you can fly…but how willing you are to jump out and try…before the wings have ever tasted wind, before the sail has ever been raised to the winds…faith is the jump!

I see that, Lord! Faith is the jump…what is the flight?

My Spirit, alone.

Oh, I see it, Lord! It makes perfect sense! Wow. I am the jump…you are the flight! I obey, and you do all the work! Lol. It’s so perfect, God. Simply perfect.



Jounral Entry #3  (This is a small bit of something Jesus said to me in January. I think he's trying to tell me something!)

This is friendship child. To walk with me to know my heart. You can be trusted with the storeroom of heaven. It doesn’t matter where you go or what you want to do…when you are my friend, your purposes are my purposes. Do you see this?

You are saying you can trust me. You can trust my choices and decisions, right?

(This makes Jesus smile.) Yes. As you carry my heart, my life inside of you, your pulse will be my pulse. You will choose what I choose. We are one. Melded together, melted down like precious metals mixed as one. True union. I can ask you what you want to do because you are full of my Spirit and he will always lead you. Do you trust this?

This is major, Jesus. This really is transformation, isn’t it?

Yes, child. You see, I give you the keys of the kingdom. Whatever YOU bind on earth will be bound in heaven. Whatever YOU lose on earth will be loosed in heaven. Because you understand me, because you are my friend….you act and think like me. You do as I would do. You just know my heart and we are made similar. So, I give you freedom to choose…baptized, dipped in the power of my Spirit. It’s amazing, yes? You are full of my light, even as the tree is full of light. You are planted as a tree among the woods. You carry so much more than you realize inside of you. You have been given my authority on this earth. Learn to trust that and walk in that. See yourself as one who can make the right decisions…as the one who knows where my Spirit is moving. You must see this in yourself. Trust my working in you. Keep your eyes off of yourself, as I see your tendency even now to look at your weakness. I am not in your weakness child. I am in your strength. I am your glory. I am the one moving and working in you to enable and empower you. Never look at your self limitations. When you do, the enemy will cloud your perspective. Keep you eyes on me.

Wow. Okay. It’s all so basic…isn’t it, Lord?

Truly, the life lived in me is simple. Man complicates it. But trust in who I am is simply that: trust. It boils down to knowing what I have said and keeping your eyes on me. Knowing that I am who I say I am IN YOU upon this earth.